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The Pitch:

Enter Intern: Chloe Mills.  Enter Executive: Bennett Ryan.  Proceed to HR disaster in the making.  And lots of sex…

The Pros:

Switching character POV, some pretty amazing one liners, smoking hot sex scenes.

The Cons:

Level of believability, the ending.

The Soapbox:

Full disclosure – I’m done with this entire series of books…ALMOST all of them.  I was so sucked in that I haven’t had time to review them until now.  While there are still – technically – three (?) of those “half” books left for me to read…I’m not gonna do it.  But I’ll save that reasoning for the review of Beautiful.

My Friend (with a capital F) is the one that convinced me to start this series.  She gave me that “first hit for free” with this one and now that I’m in official Beautiful Series Rehab I look fondly back on this book and how simple it all was at the start.  How much I liked Bennett and Chloe in THIS book.

Sure she’s kinda stupid for sticking around for as long as she did.  And sure – my prediction that things would get kind of boring once they realized they loved each other was 100% true.  And of course it still follows the tried and true method of all romance novels in terms of pacing – but it was a lot of fun.

It’s another one of those fanfiction done right kind of examples and I applaud the authors for that.  But as I sit here in Beautiful Series Rehab I can’t help but feel bittersweet about this book – the gateway drug.  If you just want to laugh about it check out MNAR.  If you want to follow me on my decent into romance novel rage…please keep reading the reviews.

The Breakdown 

Rating: 3.5 Stars – though I tend to lean toward four.

Reasoning: This book was the absolute perfect “initiation” book for me, and some of the sex scenes and one liners in this book still resonate – but the ending killed it.

Recommended For: Romance novel lovers, lovers of sass and strong female leads, Mommy’s who need a break from their lives!

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16141924The Pitch:

Jim Gaffigan laments on the perils of fatherhood to five children – and hot pockets.

The Pros:

The chapters are incredibly short and to the point, which made it a funny, quick read.

There were several parts of the book that were laugh out loud funny, and several other that gave me a chuckle.

Lots of pictures in the book, which I loved because it put a face to all his kids when I was reading.

Even though I only have one child reading his torments and victories made me incredibly sympathetic.

The Cons:

The book reads like a collection of blog posts rather than a novel.  That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but not what I was looking for.  If there would have been a more cohesive flow I think it would have helped the book be a little more literary.

The short, blog-like, chapters were incredibly repetitive in the first third of the novel.  It only took one chapter to inform me that he’s happily married with a beautiful wife, five kids, in a two-bedroom apartment in New York City, and a successful comedy career.  Yet, he tells me this almost every chapter for the first third.

The Soapbox:

There is a lot of talk in the book about both the pros and cons of having five children.  I came from a family of four, my husband is from a family of four, all of our parents came from big families – so much of what he spoke about resonated with me.  Yet, he kept coming back to the same point that he had “no idea” why they kept having children, other than being Catholic.  I just felt that was an easy out for him instead of being reflective and vulnerable about the reason they continue to have children.  Whatever he said wasn’t going to be wrong, it’s his life, his wife, his marriage – but this personal, real moment was lost in this book because he just fell onto a joke every time instead.  I really wish he had dug just a little bit deeper on some parts.

 

The Breakdown:

Rating:  Four Stars

Reasoning: Quick, easy, summer read, funny and topical (if you have kids) and, other than the repetition, worth your time.

Recommend For: Fans of Gaffigan, fans of comedy writing, parents, summer readers, pretty much anyone.

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12924261I was very surprised to find out that one of my favorite books as of late, John Dies at the End, had a sequel coming out.

Not to be outdone by the first book in the series, This Book is Full of Spiders was full of absolutely mind-bending fun.  Rather than the rambling movement toward a terrifying conclusion that John Dies had, this book was a much more structured affair.  I use this term loosely, of course, because we have switching narrators, pages from fictional novels, posts from fictional blogs, and top-secret transcripts from conversations of military personnel.

It was comforting to see all the old characters back in pretty much the same shape as we left them.  It would appear that things in “undisclosed” haven’t changed at all since the terrifying events of the previous novel.  There is plenty of referencing of the previous novel, but enough explanation that a new reader might get what is going on.  But I am honestly of the opinion that if you are going to read a series you need to start it from the beginning.

Things escalate very quickly in this novel and never slow down.  Just when you think you have a handle on what is happening something completely disturbing and unsettling throws you right off the scent again.  I am still haunted by some of the imagery created and I finished this book weeks ago.

Just like the first novel there really isn’t a lot I can say about this book without giving away everything.  It is some of the strangest and yet most brilliant writing I’ve seen in a long time.  Every piece of the novel is strategic for the conclusion and so anything I say could potentially be a spoiler.  You definitely don’t want to have anything spoiled for you in this novel so I think I need to leave it at that.  Just read these books!  Not for the faint of heart but so worth it!

My Rating:  Five Stars

My Reasoning:  Absolutely satisfying sequel to the first novel.  How often can you say that?  Both hilarious and horrifying with enough twisting and turning that you never get bored.

My Recommendations:  Fans of cracked.com, fans of the first novel, anyone that can handle some horror and dick jokes.

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Disney Hyperion

There are a lot of things about being a new mom that you have to adjust to.  I expected the sleepless nights, the bone throbbing exhaustion, the endless amount of diapers and bottles – I even knew that my social life would change and I needed to embrace it.  What I hadn’t expected was something I’ve now found I have taken for granted before having a baby – reading.  That’s right, the simple act of reading.  I could fly through a novel in a day or two back in the old days.  But now it has taken me almost two weeks to read a novel that I have been BURNING to read – The Mark of Athena.  It wasn’t until I managed to get my kid into a milk coma and kept the house silent that I was able to finally finish this book on Friday (October 26th). 

Let me start by saying the sleep deprivation and constant gurgling needs of a two month old might skew this review a little bit – but I’m going to try my best.  We have SEVEN main characters now, and I mean main characters not supporting cast.  Each one is developed and explored throughout the novel and we see them grow from whom we knew them as in the first two books (and first series for Annabeth and Percy).  This tale in the series is told through the POV of Annabeth, Leo, Piper and Percy.  Knowing that Annabeth is a daughter of Athena you pretty much assume she’s going to be the leader of this quest but you’d be wrong. 

Perhaps it was the balancing act of seven main characters, perhaps it’s because this is an obvious transitional book for the next in the series, perhaps it was because my son would only let me read this book as I carried him around in a baby bjorn – but it felt oddly disjointed this time.  The use of the multiple narrators has been amazing in the past two books but this time, with so many missions and so many characters, I kept getting a little confused and at times even felt a little slighted at not getting to read about EVERY mission and battle.  Granted – we see all the big, important ones, but I was getting used to staying with the whole group throughout the whole novel, not so much in Mark of Athena.

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Baby Bjorn – now imagine holding a book in one hand and walking around your house while reading aloud – MOTHERHOOD!!

I’m not saying it was bad – on the contrary I had several moments of silent squeals of joy (baby attached to me, remember), but it felt like it was on the verge of chaos the entire novel.  Maybe that was the point.  Seven powerful demigods, from both camps, working together against the forces of evil seems like the edge of chaos to me.  Yet, it was all well maintained and ended up giving the novel this kind of nervous energy that you know all the main characters had.

I’m not going to reveal any spoilers because I am a huge fan of Rick Riordan as well as Percy and company.  But I will tell you this…the most epic love story of all time is being written in these novels and I think it’s a shame that people don’t know about that.  Twilight, Harry Potter, Jane Austin, hell even Danielle Steel have nothing compared to Percy and Annabeth.  I’m not just saying this because I’m a fan – I’m an admitted Harry Potter addict and I still feel this way.  I honestly can’t even tell you half the awesome that happens between them in this novel because most of the examples would be full of spoilers.  But I will give you this,

“All around the Romans, Charleston Harbor erupted like a Las Vegas fountain putting on a show.  When the wall of seawater subsided, the three Romans were in the bay, spluttering and frantically trying to stay afloat in their armor.  Percy stood on the dock, holding Annabeth’s dagger.

‘You dropped this,’ he said, totally poker-faced.

Annabeth threw her arms around him.  ‘I love you!’” (Mark of Athena, page 241) 

I am still in awe of how this book ended and I groaned when I realized how long I was going to have to wait for the pick-up of the cliffhanger we were left with.  All in all it’s still an amazing book even if my sleep-deprived mind might have found it disjointed.  As always, Percy Jackson – the hero to end all heroes – receives my highest recommendation.  Really people – you’ve GOT to read these books!

 

Rating:  5 Stars

Reasoning:  Action packed missions, humor and angst, fantastic use of Greek and Roman myths with current ideals and the love story between Annabeth and Percy is completely swoon worthy! 

Recommended:  Everyone and Anyone! 

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I’ve had a very hard time trying to write a review for this book.  Not because it was bad but because it brought up so much for me.  Every time I tried sitting down and writing a review it was a rambling of ideas and thoughts that this book created for me.  It was a strange list too:

-The dangers of ‘celebrity’

-Princess culture

-How this relates to my nieces

-How princess culture translates throughout childhood and into teenage years

-The gender polarizing toy industry

-What this means for me as a future mother

Now that I have completely pushed this book from my mind and have gone back over it I think I finally know why I’ve had such a hard time reviewing this book.  This investigation into the ‘girly-girl’ culture that American society, in particular, seems to be entrenched in raises nothing but questions for us all.  The author is unable to come to any kind of conclusions; the reader is left filtering through their own thoughts about the investigation, and in the end that is okay.  There is no answer to the questions poised by this book – only bringing awareness to the subject and educating anyone that is interested.

Orenstein explores the marketing, research, education, and speculation about whether or not allowing your daughter to get lost in the entire ‘princess’ madness is healthy in this non-fiction investigation.  It’s actually a little sinister when you realize that companies like Disney have entire anagrams and made-up words specifically for all this princess stuff.  Yet, when it comes down to it, most girls grow out of this phase with no lasting negative effects.  That’s what it is – a phase.  What parents SHOULD be concerned about is what comes after it – the ‘girlz’ culture and pre-tween marketing.  If you’re not getting any visuals on ‘girlz’ or what a pre-tween could be let me remind you of Bratz dolls.  Marketed to impressionable minds as being ‘fierce and independent’, a movement away from the ‘baby toys of princess’, yet they look like hookers on a good day.

While it can be annoying and tedious to have to watch “Beauty and the Beast” five times a day and have every dress be a ‘princess dress’ it only gets much, much worse.  If you are not policing what your children are watching after they exit that ‘princess’ phase you are in for a world of trouble and fighting; because the pre-tween market moves into the tween market which is Hannah “Pole-Dancing” Montana.

There seem to only be worse examples provided to our daughters, as they get older.  Of course it all cumulates with being a teenager and the laundry list of problems that brings up.  If I’ve learned anything from my mom it’s that you consider killing your children for the first time as they move through the teenage years.

What I’ve pulled from my reading of this book is what Orenstein finished the book with – there needs to be that distinction made with girls in the pre-tween to tween market between what is REAL and what is celebrity.   Celebrity has no rules, celebrity is a horrible example to live by – celebrity should not be something to strive for.  There is nothing wrong with watching a Disney movie and wanting to pretend to be a princess as long as our daughters know that isn’t what happens in the real world.  Being able to escape into fantasy is what builds creativity and character within someone and to take that away from anyone is soul crushing and bleak.  But I just don’t see many parents making that distinction – and honestly how could you with a three year old?  Which is why I think most of the time you should just let it go with all the little girls.  It is said over and over again that it’s just a phase that girls grow out of, and we’ve all had our moments.

It’s when girls – like my 8-year-old niece –reveal a desire to be ‘famous’ that I think they should be gently moved toward something more productive.  To hear my niece tell me that she needed to be ‘famous’ like Hannah Montana or whoever that girl is on iCarly was like a kick to my chest.  She didn’t want to be famous for the usual reasons; she wanted to be a celebrity – a Kardashian!!! – and that is where the marketing and research done on pre-tweens and tweens becomes dangerous in my opinion.  We all want to be famous, we want the accolades, the recognition, the feeling of being set aside or set above, but I feel it should come with a desire to contribute.  Be famous for finding something, building something, helping with something – be famous for contributing.  You should never want to be famous for reasons other than that because that’s not being famous, it’s being infamous – it’s celebrity.  Let’s get real here Kim Kardashian is a celebrity because she made a sex tape and leveraged that into a series of lies and questionable businesses.  We need to make sure girls don’t look up to horrible examples like that and think that celebrity is something to strive for.

Needless to say I told my niece that she could and would be famous if that is her desire in life, but that it should be for something substantial because SHE is something more than fame.  She is smart, she is kind, she is funny – and that should be enough to help her toward fame.  We all want the seemingly easy life of celebrity but that should not be a goal of an 8 year old – it should be something much more substantial.  The day that we stop encouraging our young girls to be more than just pretty is the day that we doom ourselves.

After all the thoughts and ideas that this book brought up for me the bottom line seems to be that you need to be an active, conscious, and consistent parent.  Know what your children are watching and reading.  Pay attention to what is actually being presented on the shows and books and toys they are playing with and what kind of play it is creating.  Finally, don’t ever be afraid to tell them no and KEEP telling them no.  iCarly might be what everyone is watching – but if your gut is telling you that it’s not appropriate for your six-year-old child then DON’T let them watch it.

Rating:  4 Stars

Reasoning:  A very intelligent investigation that doesn’t give any kind of finite answer but instead challenges ideas and norms that we have come to accept about ourselves and our daughters.

Recommended For:  Anyone that has a little girl in their life that they care about.

 

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I can’t believe I’m going to say this…I really didn’t like the new Mortal Instruments book.  If you could see me right now I’m shaking my head with disgust.  Perhaps you think I’m being a little too judgmental but at 5 books in Miss Clare should have been giving me much better material to work with.  I hated Order of the Phoenix because it was so dark and painful to read but it was still a fantastic book.  City of Lost Souls was NOT a fantastic book.  I have a fangirl crush on this series so to be let down by this much anticipated book was monumental for me.  For that reason alone there WILL be spoilers in this post…and if you don’t want to read them I suggest you jump to the bottom…right now.

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1.  How many times do I have to read about people sleeping in beds?

Was this supposed to be some kind of ultimate romantic gesture?  Was it meant to keep things relatively chaste and yet still endearing and flowery and all that BS?  How many times do these characters need to sleep in beds next to each other before the actual reality of teenagers sleeping in the same bed happens?  Does no one have sex on beds in this universe?  Because even the two characters that DO manage to act like real teenagers and screw each other don’t feel the need to use a bed – ever.

 

2.  I am DONE with the platonic love story between Clary and Simon.

It is not fair to Simon.  It makes Clary look flighty and unreliable.  It’s completely unbelievable.  Quite frankly it was annoyingly distracting to read throughout the entire novel.  I understand that they are close because of their upbringing and fighting in a war together but all the bed sleeping and forehead kissing and texting and secret missions and confessions of love make Clary unlikable.  She is supposed to be in love with Jace – or at least in lust with him, yet continues to lean on Simon and use him throughout the series.

It is even brought up by Izzy that she thinks she can’t actually have a relationship with Simon because he’s still so f-ing wrapped up in Clary.  And that is ALL Clary’s fault.  I’m putting the blame on her.  She’s the one that keeps roping Simon into these messes.  She’s the one that needed him to sleep next to her and hold her hand and BS like that.  It’s all Clary.  She need to grow up, move on, and accept her destiny and allow Simon to be happy without her. 

I’ve had very close friendships with guys – I got along better with them.  This…thing between Clary and Simon it doesn’t happen in the real world.  It doesn’t even happen in the Mortal Instrument universe.  There is no other relationship like this because everyone else acts like they should when dealing with the opposite sex – either turned on or turned off – not this weird limbo BS that Clare keeps forcing on us.

 

3.  Why is relationship drama the driving force of all these characters?

I’m not criticizing the relationships themselves (though most of them need it), nor am I criticizing the idea that drama within a relationship can create plot and character building moments.  What I am saying is that every single character in this novel is driven to do pretty much anything because of the unnecessary and at times annoying drama that they created within their current or potential relationship.  The entire plot of this novel is supposed to be about the brewing war and the hell demons that are being raised by Sebastian and zombie Jace – but that takes a back seat to everyone’s relationship drama.

Alec and Mangus bicker throughout the entire book and Alec is driven with some bizarre need to know Mangus’ past and so he creates drama within their relationship by going behind his back and consorting with one of his evil ex’s.  This of course leads to Mangus’ breaking up with Alec and he’s suddenly so F-ING surprised that his stupid obsession has come back to bite him in the ass.  Really Alec?  Really?  You’re supposed to be the level headed normal character and yet the ENTIRE novel you are possessed with some stupid need to bring drama into your relationship. 

Isabelle – likewise – spends the entire novel being wishy-washy about her feelings about Simon.  She wants him to sleep in her bed, she wants him to bite her, she wants him to talk to her, she wants his attention…but only if he says that he likes her.  What kind of petty BS is that?  Really Isabelle?  Your badass character is degraded to some high school mean girl status because you’re too pretty to tell a boy that you like him?  And Simon can barely tell that Isabelle is playing games with him because he’s stuck in platonic love story land with Clary through the entire novel. 

The worst offenders are Clary and Jace.  Granted I expect it at this point.  If their relationship had been normal and lovely to read it might have surprised the crap out of me and I might have liked this book.  Instead you have Clary’s worst betrayal of Jace yet in this series.  Why he is still with her after all the absolute BS she’s put him through I will never understand.  I find it very hard to see how she could be forgiven for what she did to Jace without even a second thought from him.  She is the soul reason that there is going to be another war.  She is the only reason that Sebastian was able to rise to power.  She is the entire reason that Jace now has some kind of X-Men power.  Clary is basically the entire reason that pretty much any of the drama and world ending events have happened in this book.  She refuses to see reason, she does not think of consequences, she will most likely continue to ignore advice and wishes of any other character as long as she gets what she wants.  She’s selfish and dangerous, she runs off impulse and not reason, and she needs to somehow be incapacitated in the next book if anyone plans on getting out alive.  She will be the reason the world ends.  You mark my words now.

 

4.  Cassandra Clare has a very strange obsession with incest.

You know…reading it through those first few books it was taboo and forbidden – it gave this series an edge that not a lot of others have.  I don’t know if it was ever really necessary to do that with Clary and Jace but it made for an interesting read.

BUT – to have Sebastian basically tell his sister that he fully intends to rape her (in so many words) is crossing some kind of line that makes me wonder what is going on in Cassandra Clare’s head.  I’m pretty sure she’s an only child so I don’t think she’s working on some therapy here.  Sebastian is pretty damn evil all on his own so there was no need to add this element of incest to his evil ‘to-do list’.  So that leaves – for me at least – some strange obsession that Clare has with incest in general.  It was incredibly uncomfortable to read because I KNEW that there was no way Jace and Clary could be related – but it is made abundantly clear that Clary and Sebastian are related.  There was just no need for it and yet it is teased throughout the entire book cumulating with Sebastian practically molesting Clary after beating the every loving crap out of her.  I…just…why???

If you got into writing to write about incest…maybe you should just keep those little ‘gems’ to your fanfiction career where they belong.  I’m just baffled by it.

 

 

This book was a colossal waste of my time.  I can sum up the entire plot of it within a few sentences and yet it took over 500 pages for Clare to get there.  The unnecessary repetitive droning of relationship drama, the increasing events that made me want to strangle Clary, and the underpinning of creepy that permeated throughout this entire novel made for an uncomfortable and boring read.  I’m actually glad there is only one book left in this series because at this point I don’t know if I’ll have the energy to read past that.

 

Rating:  Two Stars

Reasoning:  Ridiculous drama, unnecessary creepiness, with almost nothing happening within the 500 pages, left me with a very bitter taste in my mouth.

Recommended For:  No one.  If you need to know what happened in this book just email me and I’ll give you the five-sentence break down.

 

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I wasn’t going to read this series.  Was not even remotely interested in it.  I’d heard about it, read an article that was absolutely tearing it apart for what it was about, seen the SNL skit, but I still just wasn’t interested enough.  Of course, all it takes is one suggestion from a friend and I decide otherwise.  But, this time I’m almost regretful that I did read it after a friend recommendation; mostly because it saddens me that I can’t share in my friend’s excitement over the series.  After the media circus that has erupted over this book, and the many (many) conversation starters that I could have about this book – in the end I didn’t like it because it just wasn’t very good.  Not because of the content, not because of the scandal, not because of the questionable media coverage…it just wasn’t good.  Here’s why:

1.  It reeked of Twilight fanfiction.  I know there have already been numerous articles written in criticism about the origins of this story being fanfiction – that’s not really my issue.  If an author is able to take something she/he wrote as fanfiction and turn it into something marketable more power to them (worked out for Cassandra Clare), publishing is an awful beast that is being run by the masses these days anyway.  MY ISSUE is that after making it through an online publication and a professional edit to be released as a ‘real’ work of fiction I, as the reader, shouldn’t be able to tell it was EVER fanfiction.  That is just not the case with this story and that was insufferably frustrating to read…for 500 pages.

2.  It never graduated to anything substantial.  Perhaps because it is just professionally edited fanfiction that is the reason that this story was lacking – but I think its just bad writing.  If there is going to be 500 pages of story something pretty epic better happen.  There should be some kind of universal truth revealed; there should be some kind of hero’s journey, or Jesus…even a character arch.  None of that happened.  The characters remained almost exactly the same from the beginning of the story to the end.  The settings and situations of the story remained almost exactly the same from beginning to end.  If there WAS a theme…I couldn’t find it, and it was never developed by the end of the story.  This story never graduated to anything an actual piece of fiction would have manifested into and that made it boring and repetitive fanfiction.

3.  The main character went from forgettable to unlikeable.  Now if you are basing your character development off of Bella Swan you basically have a blank slate to work with – she is one of the most awful female heroines I’ve seen written in a long time.  The author was able to take that blank slate and make her character, Ana, into someone at least forgettable.  I didn’t hate the girl, but her stereotypical clumsiness and lack of conviction and self-confidence about anything made me not like her either.  She was forgettable – her friend Kate was much more interesting to read and sadly barely makes an appearance throughout the marathon of this story.  Yet, as Ana is put through her paces by Christian she goes from forgettable to completely unlikeable by the end of the story.  She was reduced to some horrible jealous harpy that cannot let his past go and continually goads and provokes his temper and moods and yet is confused and upset by his reactions.  In other words the author takes a seemingly normal girl, introduces her to sex, and this event transforms her into a bitch.  When with female authors realize that MOST woman don’t want to read this?  It is just perpetuating the idea that women are needy bitches, and authors continue to lose an amazing opportunity to write about a strong female character that is sexually confidant and mentally stable.

4.  This is a story about mental illness shrouded by BDSM.  You get about 50 pages into the book and realize that Christian Gray is mentally ill.  Not in a ‘haha – yeah we all are’ but as in he has bi-polar disorder with aggressive tendencies and a problem with personal boundaries.  He is a crazed stalker that has so much money he’s used to getting exactly what he wants.  If you peel away all the kinky sex that is happening in this book you realize it’s about the fallout of child abuse.  Which would actually be interesting to read, but that is continually swept under the rug by the author.  You can’t even be mad at Christian Gray for being so mentally ill because he’s going to therapy and supposedly taking drugs for his issues.  He’s doing the best he can with the horrible cards that were dealt to him.  But the author keeps bringing it up throughout the story as a way to distract the reader from realizing that is the ONLY legitimate storyline happening.  Basically, what I’m trying to say is that if you take away Christian’s back story that is teased throughout the 500 pages you’re just reading porn.

5.  The availability of this book is troubling to me.  I’m not saying this book should be banned, but I do think this book should have a warning.  I’m also not so naïve to know that if a teenage girl wants to get her hands on this book she will.  Honestly I’ve read A LOT worse on fanfiction sites than this book can provide and that is not regulated at all.  But, I think that by having this book easily accessible to teenage girls and boys is setting a bit of a scary precedence for me.  I remember having conversations with my grown friends about how I don’t think 11 year old girls should be allowed to read Breaking Dawn without speaking with a parent about it, or how my niece in the 4th grade probably shouldn’t be reading Goblet of Fire until she had a better understanding of evil and death.  If we are putting this book out on the shelves at Target then what are we saying to pre-teen girls whose parents don’t care enough to know what they are reading?  I’m always a firm believer that parenting should come first, you NEED to know what your children are reading.  But if you’d have to input your birth year onto an online site to read about the stuff happening in this book (which doesn’t deter teenagers anyway), then why isn’t there ANY kind of regulation when it comes to the print version?  I don’t have an answer…it just worries me that if we let this one go what will be next?

In the end I didn’t like this book because it was poorly written.  My suspension of disbelief over what this girl accomplishes sexually over the course of two weeks after being a virgin was just shattered.  The only reason people are talking so much about this series is because of the KIND of sex that they are having and quite frankly it was more unbelievable than shocking to me.  Maybe that says something about me, but honestly some of the mechanics of what was going on was just laughable and distracting.  Smut written for smut has its place and I welcome it in its place.  Writing a 500-page novel and trying to pass it off as fiction is not where smut lives.

I actually groaned when I realized I’d already told my friend I’d read the next one in the series.  I just don’t know if I have the patients to slog through and skip over another 500 pages of nothing.  I hope these books are printed on recycled paper because honestly it wasn’t worth the trees we killed for the ink.

Rating:  Two Stars

Reasoning:  Interesting enough in the first 150 pages, almost unreadable in the last 150 pages.

Recommended For:  No one really, but if you need something to talk about on coffee breaks than I guess…

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